you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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