She's JV to your varsity
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Found my paycheck. It was in the freezer
Randomize
