The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
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