walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize
