I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
