My hair reeks of homosexuality.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
