Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Randomize