When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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