I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
he wants to bone in the snuggie
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
