so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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