i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize