just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
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