OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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