You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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