She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Randomize