And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Randomize
