1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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