She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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