they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
