I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Text me some of your sweat
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