You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I need to calm my uterus...
On a serious note, don't let me forget to tell you about firecracker baseball. I'm glad I have my fingers. I had to count them.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
