and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
