Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I cannot find my penis.
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I believe in your delicious
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Randomize
