woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
