Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Randomize