...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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