wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
