omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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