Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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