Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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