Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
