they need to just BURY HIM!
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Randomize
