i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
