hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
