great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
