porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
