And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
