i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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