I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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