How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I asked him if we could have sex sometime and he sent me a three page long text about his feelings for me. that's the only possible situation I've ever run into where a "k" response would have been more appropriate.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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