There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Man it shouldn't be possible to get mad while you're stoned. I feel like ive broken one of the laws of physics
Randomize