Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
