Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize