Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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