I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
Randomize
