She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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