So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Randomize
