you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
