You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
