i would punch a child for taco bell
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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